Science is DominoqqGoalden.

The definition of happiness is spending time with the one you love; for me, that’s the television. Having accidentally flicked on to a science channel, I was intrigued by the following question, “What came first, the chicken or the egg?”

Armed with just Wayne Rooney, an egg, a 20 year old brunette from Manchester and a nightclub kitchen, I conducted an experiment that could easily land me a Nobel Prize.

Given only six minutes and 22 seconds in the controlled environment, Rooney completely ignored the opportunity to enjoy a nice boiled egg; instead, the play bazaar bird received his full attention.

Is Wayne Rooney a metaphor for life itself? I’ll let you be the judge. Are Man Utd a good bet to beat West Ham at 8/13? Undoubtedly. Sir Alex has neutered, sorry nurtured young Rooney along wonderfully; the big lad is available at 20/1 to score another three times.

Rio Ferdinand will play against his brother in a competitive match for the first time, there’s a 62% chance of Rio ending up with the bragging-rights; that’s almost two Ferds.

Alan Pardew suggested that Anton Ferdinand should change his hairstyle to differentiate himself from his brother. I’d like to suggest the Kevin Keegan style from the 70’s, as my Grandma used to say after senility kicked in, ‘The surly Ferd matches the perm’. You can back either brother to score at 11/2, both brothers finding the net is a 150/1 shot.

Arsenal meet Blackburn for the first time since last seasons FA Cup semi-final, where Robin Van Persie and Andy Todd’s elbow were so close, they’re now exchanging Christmas presents. Blackburn attempted to kick Arsenal off the pitch that day, another tasty encounter could be on the cards. You can back a player to be sent off at 3/1.

Thierry Henry is in a rich vein of form at Highbury, the majestic Frenchman has netted 15 goals in his last 10 games. He’s 12/1 to net a hat-trick against Blackburn, and that’s not the worst punt in the World; Portsmouth to beat Chelsea is.

Chelsea’s mini blip was over before it really began; Pompey haven’t won at home this season and Chelsea have never lost a league match outside Manchester under Mourinho. Chelsea are a great bet to hack up, it’s as easy as 1/3.

You can question the goal scoring ability of Liverpool’s Peter Crouch, but he’s undeniably a true gentleman. Even football commentators address him as Mr. Crouch; although they often use his pseudonyms, Mr. Penalty and Mr. Nother-Sitter. Liverpool have won their last three league matches, scoring 10 goals without reply. The ‘Pool are 6/4 to beat Man City; meet the weekend nap.